Sometimes

Sometimes there is no guarantee that you can make a life’s work out of doing what you love.

Sometimes in spite of good intentions the time you need to keep the momentum going that is needed for being a serious novelist just won’t be there.

Sometimes the money or programme or encouragement to be able to put that time aside won’t materialise.

Or sometimes it will materialise for others and not for you and sometimes their work will be deserving and sometimes it won’t. And that can be as much luck and timing as anything else.

Though sometimes it won’t be just luck and timing. Sometimes it will be social nous, cunning, charisma and plenty of other things that are not related to writing but seem to help push their work up the greasy pole.

Sometimes you will fight for your work in an environment where people fight dirty. And sometimes you will rest and fight another day.

And sometimes you will be given an unexpected gift of time and fill it up with work. And hope that the work you have given at the end of this time is enough, because you are not going to get that gift again. That is where I am right now.

Sometimes a crazy piece of luck might help turn things around. The right person loves your first novel. Or something in your synopsis inflames the imagination of an international person who might help you. Just something, one thing, sometimes, might lift you out of the cycle. Take the endless striving off your shoulders. That is not where I am right now.

Or sometimes, you might walk away replete with the knowledge that at least you have done your utmost.

Sometimes, it is hard to know what will happen.

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Sometimes

10 thoughts on “Sometimes

    1. Thanks Oran. Walking this path makes me understand why some people write one or two books, then stop. Without the support of a small, tight-knit community it can be very hard to keep going alongside the demands of life.

      People don’t stop writing because they don’t want to, but because with the best intentions from everyone, investment doesn’t equal return. That is a possibility that needs to be considered.

      1. When I started doing Poethead, the reaction was “oh that is very brave” or “Are there enough women poets to proceed” ? Eight years now, blasting it out of the park. 🙂 A writer writes and writes.

  1. Nicole Murphy says:

    Hi Susan,
    It breaks my heart to read this.
    You are my new favourite author and I am looking forward to reading more of you in the future.
    You are a writer through and through. There will come a time in the future when you just HAVE to write!
    But… sometimes… it’s OK to take a break and focus on other things and don’t feel guilty about it. You will come back to it.
    As an atheist I’m not one to quote the bible but as someone once said – “There’s a time to reap and a time to sow…..”.
    Life is seasonal. Reap for a while! You’ll be sowing again when the conditions are favourable.
    And… If all conditions are not favourable… here’s another gem a monk in the Blackforest told me: “The early bird gets the worm”…. But we heard that one before! WHEN you feel the need to write in the future but can’t find the time – get up 1.5 hours early and get back into the habit again.
    XXXXX

    1. I never acknowledged your beautiful comment, Nicole. I love the reaping and sowing analogy, but then again as you know I am celebrating a late autumn harvest right now 🙂

  2. TU says:

    Sometimes you have to have faith that there are people out there silently — or loudly — cheering you on. I hope your determination carries right on, no matter all the glitches in the journey. xx

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